Desperate times call for…humiliating measures
On Valentine’s Day a routine ultrasound revealed that our daughter, at thirty-nine weeks gestation, had flipped from the standard vertex position into the footling breech. Instead of celebrating our love with flowers and candlelight, my husband and my every thought
Marriage Does Not Mean Seeing Eye To Eye
My husband and I often do not see eye to eye, and that is not just because of our twelve inch height difference. I have a weakness for wrapping babies like little burritos until their scrunched, reddened faces are the
Don’t Worry, Be Happy
"We experience moments absolutely free from worry. These brief respites are called panic." ~Cullen HightowerI was on the floor doing mandatory stretches for birthing class when I paused mid cat/cow to eavesdrop on the girl whose strident voice was asking
Towanda!
Whenever I wake up to go to the bathroom (again), and look over at my husband blissfully sleeping on his stomach with one leg hiked up like he’s leaping hurdles in his dreams, I feel like taking the gigantic pillow
The Great Mystery
It is impossible to imagine what our child will be like coming from parents so starkly contrasted in both personality and looks. I’ll go so far as to squint at my husband -- attempting to transplant his square shoulders and mountain-man scruffies
Little People Can Have Babies Too!
My husband and I were sitting on the couch, having our morning coffee, when I paused in the magazine I was flipping through and showed him the picture. “Do you think our daughter’ll look like that?” I asked.Taking a sip
You Know You’re Taking Advantage of Your Pregnancy When . . .
You claim that baby really wants Daddy to watch Pride and Prejudice with him/her, the five hour version with Colin Firth and the pond scene. You preface every chore around the house with a sign and “I would do it, Honey, but
What NOT to Say to a Pregnant Woman
Every six months our health inspector arrives at our outlet grocery store with a clipboard wedged under his armpit, a stained governmental baseball cap covering his balding head, and a mouth on him as garrulous as a pubescent girl’s. Because